New Year

I don't feel like blogging these days. Life's good, not great. My last holidays in college are going just usual. Completely vella all the time and most of the time boring. In college when companies are coming, revising college stuff. When home most of the time am online, and that too only to find myself looking through specifications of Missiles and rifles and aircraft ( as though am going to experience any of it :( in near future...).

Life is dull but at least am aware of the fact that there isn't much tension now (compared to a life that i would be having just after 6 months from now). Got placed in IBM. Yet feeling nothing different whatsoever. Infact the very reaction to the news when they put up that notice on the training and placement department was like... "ok! yeah! finally ek job mili". Hope of getting a better job is diminishing by the day. Yet am trying to linger on. Hope.

"Hope is a quintessential human delusion, perhaps the source of mans greatest weakness and his greatest strength" - The Architect (Matrix)

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I dunno what to write next... The sounds of crackers bursting and diwali rockets zooming here and there outside my window tell me that the clock has crossed the 12 mark and 2010 has sneaked in just a few minutes ago.

Watched two movies day before yesterday. Vicky Christina Barcelona & Patriot games. The first one was nice. In fact it was very nice (sply when you got both penelope cruz & scarlet johansson to gether). The latter was trash. Typical run of the mill Hollywood affair with absolutely no frills.

What else to write... yaar it seems am again getting back to dairy writing on the blog... and thats something i hate...

Happy New Year to all!

adios.

heartburn

its been long time... yet sometimes i reminisce of things i... i longed for and now i don't.... they seem far trivial...

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i often wonder bout how relationships work and why *sometimes* they don't. Why sometimes two are attracted and why sometimes one doesn feel the same. Why does one long for company? and why does the heart *burn* sometimes? why people are attracted towards falling in love and yet not notice how complicated it is.. and and how and why does loneliness suck a lot of times?

Is it all just a metamorphosis of all thats physical...carnal...hormonal?

What is love? and why does heart *burn*?

i luv my loneliness. it aint bad i can tell you... i luv sitting in my room.. disconnected.. Games novels.. movies.. net... a quiet dinner.. and yet heart *burns*!

i luv company. its certainly better in many ways. sharing dinner... snacks... talks... tasks... Still heart *burns*...

what is it that i long for?

Is it something thats achievable through love.. but is something beyond love..

Am i talking sense or its just nonsense?

Why does heart *burn*?

P.S. sometimes its just questions. no answers.

P.P.S i guess am having a lot of trans fats in my diet... could be a cause of heart burns :P

Rejections continued…

I guess after this post I mush change the name of my blog to "rejections chronicle". :D

( Hows the name?If you feel its good or want to suggest ny other plz feel free to drop in a comment)

*****

Some days just turn out bad . Went for an "interview" of sorts today, for a two month internship for this startup called "xyz".

:)

Humiliated. Disgraced and if at all anything was left… the enlightened one took care of it with the immortal query… "ahem! So where were you placed?" (asked it three times in a matter of 3 hours)

Well day started not so fine with a pretty early morning wake up call (who wakes at 730 at this time of the year? :P). Hopped the metro. And hopping I went and sat at the good'ol, 50-bucks-a-cup coffee shop (they also call it the CCD) at Noida . No idea as to what I was to expect of the meeting, I had not even bought a copy to answer the questions for the torture about to happen. And without much ado started the enlightened one grilling. He mocked, ridiculed , humiliated and dunno what… at times I matched his demeanor with my gaucherie and rest of the times I guess he was just mad at me for being there amongst "the chosen ones" ( was rejected when I applied first). The rest of the next two hours all just adds to my large collection of "best rejection" memories. (13 of them total (:P) , including the big ones Cisco, Citrix, etc etc... + 1 aaj mila ke).

Well In no ways do I blame him, actually I made sure I had it all coming. To tell you the funny part, I had applied for this internship the first time and he had downright rejected me! (:P) So I stooped a level low and tried the old book trick. Wrote him a letter, begged him for a second chance. And Incidentally the first draft of that letter was so rude, had I sent that one… I guess the enlightened one would have slapped me today! (:D) Then add to it that I even convinced my friend to write a recommendation letter who had worked with him earlier.

& The next thing that I knew was that I had this msg last night, that I am to meet the guy at Noida next morning 1130.

:)

Uske baad to happy ending ho gayi jee

*****

P.S. Sooner or later am going to get a job. I will do good. When I do, and when I reach the position I will mock and ridicule other people when they come for interviews. It must be fun. (:D)

P.P.S It ain't that fun now, sitting continuously on the other side of the table. Sometimes it gets sad, depressing and demeaning… :(

A Friday.

Friday was pretty much hectic. 7th sem ends. the classes. Morning to evening the schedule was jam packed. Pracs, vivas, admit card, photocopies, frnds, maggi at mech....

Gawd! am nearly begging time to stop. I dont want the college to end. ever. And its sheer desperation as i feel the days pass. Ive always felt that i dwell on my past and many a times i dont like it. But thinking bout the time of my life that i had in college... somewhere inside its just blues and butterflies... and i just want to go back... and i wouldnt regret it...

See! i dwell on my past... start talking random...

So coming back to the beautiful memorable Friday, as i walked back from college to hostel all weary and exhausted i recalled that today, the last day of sem, the second years were hosting the Freshers night. And there was this second year that i know walking back home.

He says hellos and i ask him, "why are you going back?... aaj to freshers hai, arent second years supposed to be there?"

and he replied with his sunny smile... "Sir! kuch ahchaa nahi ho rha... havan hoga... aap lekin attend jaruur karna... aapka last hai!"

Hell! that hurt somewhere. "My last freshers". I never counted that one coming...

.............

I still remember my freshers nite... That was like the best thing that had ever happened, back then... The Drama... the Solo song... Refreshments... Mech canteen's photo session... And the JAM...

Sounds trivial, yet everything seems so fresh and special...

.........

And there i was sitting in the audience... observing... May be trying to find myself in the crowd... and and... i did find myself... a lot of "myself's"... in many of the first years... in their jokes, in their careless postures, in their smiles... in their lack of that "experience"... which they would have in the four years to come. And they would experience it all... i hope they all do.... just like i did... amen!

P.S. Missed out on a lot of things that i could have written about... the trip, the dinner treat, the pup, the JAM, the alice in the wonderland, drag me to hell-Full metal jacket... but i guess somethings are better preserved in heart. Thats where they are supposed to belong. Not on stupid blogs. :)

on why i should be in dunn... lol..

disclaimer: all thats written here is purely coincidental and fictional. No bearing with anything truthful or real.

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I would love to join Dunnhumby for 3 reasons.

I have spent my entire childhood travelling and living in various parts of India, in towns big and small and have a firsthand experience of living in varied socio-economic milieu that enrich India. I have also completed my entire schooling in government schools in various parts of India and it further inculcated in me a sense of appreciation and understanding of different cultures and how diversity adds up to make things beautiful and complete. Now from what i gather from Dunnhumby’s presentation today and its website is that it’s a company primarily driven by a focus towards customers, and in other words to understand customers. Thus, when i, as someone who has some understanding of various cultures and differences, say that i like and i understand what Dunnhumby does, i know it’s about knowing and understanding people.

The second reason is the idea of working with a multinational-multicultural organization with vastly talented people. Dunnhumby as an organization puts genius in delivering the best to its customers. And to deliver genius one has to have genius which in Dunnhumby are the people working for it. Joining a company with such a talent pool & global exposure would benefit me personally and professionally.

Thirdly, for me working for Dunnhumby would be a long term career decision coherent with my career objective. I want to make a career out of something that i like doing. I have a passion for knowing people and my schooling and college have inculcated in me analytical skills essential for the job at Dunnhumby. Thus Dunnhumby for me is a logical choice.