Tuesday, August 26, 2008

its f***in 4:30 am and i feel tipsy!

I donno if am ever gonna blog this one…

Its dead past 3 am. Dead.
Not a single soul in the entire hostel corridor… its silent. Silence.
I just went to fill up my bottle with water. I realized that I never knew, Beethoven could ever be so scary… was it the empty corridor or may be the flickering tube light right in the aqua-guard pavement or may be the way the whole symphony was emanating from the aqua-guard machine. Scary.

It was just another paranoid evening again. A paranoid evening.
3 movies back to back. No studies. No database, no algorithms, neither microelectronics. 3 movies back to back. 3.

Lucky number slevin.
Boat-trip.
A requiem for a dream.

A requiem for a dream. Did I fell in love with Jenifer Connelly all over again? (why do they have to shed their clothes so much in Hollywood?... Nude. Nudity.)
Requiem for a dream was sad.
It was about addiction and how it destroys the dreams of the four protagonists in the movie.

Am I addicted?
Smoking? Cigarettes?
Alcohol? Vodka?
Music? Metal?
Movie? Good?

nope.

Am I little jerked right now. Lol. Jerked!
Do I need a smoke? May be, but I haven't got any. I never do. I never buy one.

Hey! Its 4 now.
I need to sleep. Sleep.

Sleep isn't what I need. I need more. its all craving sometimes.
Why don’t I have a girlfriend?
And why is silky so elusive sometimes and so "more than friendly" the other?
And why is she so beautiful?
And why am I not able to study? Fuck! I watched 3 movies today. 3 movies. 6 and half hours.

I wanna get out of college soon. It sucks. It sucks bad. And I hate people. I love my friends. Friends. My fraternity of friends. And I hate people. All of them. And I like being alone. No one. Solipsism.
Sneering ass holes, and their silly jokes… their carefree postures and the utter neglect.
All that shimmers this moment is sure meant to fade away… so soon…

And I watched 3 movies today.
3 movies back to back. No studies. No database, no algorithms, neither microelectronics. 3 movies back to back. 3.

Lucky number slevin.
Boat-trip.
A requiem for a dream.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

lonely planet






A few of the pics i took on train on my journey back from tinsukia(the oil india ltd ... oil fields...) (Assam) to New delhi this summer.

(some insight on trip: went there to visit maasi ji and enjoyed a lot... khana-khana aur bahut saara khaana was all abt the stay at maasi ji's grand house... bas aate samay phat gaye buree vaali... all trains and flights were booked... was somehow able to grab these bramhaputra mail tickets on... and the f***ed up train takes damn freakin 52 hours to reach delhi. i still am in awe as to how i managed to do the journey all alone...
as for the scenic beauty that ive been fortunate enough to be able to experience... here's a sampler from my mobile cam)

Saturday, August 16, 2008

of things learnt in first year : revisited

i wrote this way back in first year...
and just as i was flipping through my MS one note pages, i saw it again...
i was trying to be funny writing this... and now i realize how true i was about this...




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(Although I "don’t" like to share the following tenets I've learnt in the first year at college, but due to some special requests to put this one also on my blog, I oblige….)


Few things i can tell for sure i learnt in college...


1. Ive learned that no matter how good a bandi is, how hard u try to b honest with her, befriend her... care for her, she’ll only contribute to your alcoholism.


2. Ive learned that no matter how much I care, some people(other than our good ol chicks) are just assholes.


3. Ive learned you should always leave loved ones with loving words. You may need to borrow money, n take treats.


4. Ive learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones who do.(So kick ass when u hav time!)


5. Ive learned that you shouldnt compare yourself to others — they are more fucked up than you think.


6. I've learnt that no matter how hard I try I cant work-hard/study until am in serious trouble.(so I don take the trouble to even plan studies before exam season).


7. Ive learned to say, FUCK U ! if they can’t take a joke” in 6 languages.(N may b thats y they call me "THE FUCK MAN" lol..).


Sorry but thats the way I am. Cant help being cynical !!

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Tuesday, August 5, 2008

nahi! mai marna nahi chahta!!!

Am scared of dying.Really f***in scared of death! I don wanna die yet.
(… well I haven't even married yet!)
But am writing this just in case… (after the jaipur incident when I was nearly crushed by bus, or the hostel incident when I nearly fell of the roof, or the one before… and may be due these ridiculously regular terrorist attack I certainly think that am in sure mortal danger… engineer bante-bante shaeed ho jaunga.)
So the idea is to record a sentence for each of the persons I would like to tell before dying. (imagine the scene where am shot a bullet - bollywood ishtyle- and am making a parting speech… that happens to be bit ……………………. Long)

My last sentence.
As soon as I realize am going to die : nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
(the last sentence marathon starts:)
To ,

Maa: maa! I love you!

Papa: love you too! Bye!... Thanx for the car!

Bhaiya: love you! But hoped we were much better and closer friends…

(friends, teachers and others … now the order is random… not in order of importance)

Bhaskar : saale! Tere sir pe marne se pehle baal dekh kar khushi hui! Tu mast roomie aur dost hai!

Maneet: Kamine! S****** ko propose kyon nahi karta, gadhe!

Barue: Ab to CR banne ke liye khada ho ja! (btw you were always gr8 support)

Antriksh: Tu BOND hai bhai!

Nigam: itna mat padh! Aur… iDCE site chaalu kar dio… mera credit jaruur likhio… aur blog entry bhi … aur ...nahii! Mai marna nahi chahta… mere badle tuu aaja !

Ap: Yo baby! Good bye! Shayad ye meri aakhiri "seher" hai…

Aastha: Mateey! ...Aastha maa!... Paranam!

Swati: Smile plz!

Ankita: lol kya likhun? Good bye! Tu bhi US chali jaiyo sis ki tareh!

Atulya: always considered you a frnd bro!... Still…

Kiki: thanx!

Kanika: wishing your best… as always… keep smiling!

Ankit (bihari): Satanism follow karle… marke tu bhi mere saath narak mein daaru-sutta karne waala hai!

Amar: doob mar! dekh marne mein bhi tujhe beat kar diya!

Anupam (dadhi vaala): Chal! Chal! Side se nikal le!... Cheap thrills vaale!

Sarabjot: "singh is kinng" dikha de yaar!... Ab to mar raha hun… ab to dikha de!

Saksham: oye narak mein vo homeworld-3 ki CD le aiyo... narak mein gaing facilty ka pata nahi..... par agar ho to mazaa ayega...

Silky [;)]: lol… date???

Swayam: yaar! Your name sounds like some guy! But you write gr8 stuff! Keep blogging!

Hostel admin: Jaake duub maro kamino! Narak mein aao! Tab bataunga!

College admin: kaamchoron! tumhe narak mein 4 ghate ki line mein khada nahi karya to…!@#$

Mess vaale bhaiya : bhaiya ek pepsi de do… kissi aur ke naam pe entry karke… !

NSR sir: Sir! Tussi gr8 ho! Amrika de atom, india de hope ho! Bas ab hamein padhana chod do!

Jagaa sir: Are you aasteller???

Vidhi Mam: you were great! I never missed your class… par class jaldi choda karo!... 2 ghante pakaya mat karo!

Kakali Maam: ab to black board pe bada-bada likho! Last bench pe nahi dikhta!

Director (of college): Sir! Main engineer bante bante shaheed ho raha hun… Auditorium (jo ab tak nahi bana) ka naam mere naam pe kar do!... Future students inspire honge!

(I may have missed out on a few ppl… hard luck… pare shayad mere paas jyada time nahi tha… goli ne jaan le lee…)Nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!!